Band 7 The school library is seeking applicants for a job over summer break. Write a letter to the library’s manager. Solved
The school library is seeking applicants for a job over summer break. Write a letter to the library’s manager.
Dear Sir or Madame,
My name is Jonathan Riley and I am a 3rd year student. I am studying Biology and plan on going to graduate school after I graduate. I am writing to express my interest in the open job position at the school library. I saw the advertisement posted on the job board in the career centre.
While I was in high school, I worked as a volunteer at my local library. I helped the other librarians with checking out books, returning books to the shelves, and answering the telephones. I spent a year as a volunteer there.
I noticed that the position is part time, which would be great because I still need some time to study. I have some relevant experience and I’m a person dedicated to doing a good job. I am available at your convenience and can be reached by phone or by email.
Sincerely,
Jonathan Riley
Grammar Summary
6 errors detected: 2 spelling, 1 capitalization, 2 informality, 1 hyphenation.
Detailed Feedback & Recommendations
The letter fully addresses the prompt by expressing interest in the job and providing relevant details about the applicant's experience and availability. The tone is appropriate for a formal job application. However, the details could be more specific to the school library's needs, and the tone, while formal, could be slightly more polished.
The letter has a logical flow and clear structure, with an appropriate opening and closing. The use of linking phrases is adequate, but could be improved with more variety. The progression of ideas is clear, but some transitions between paragraphs could be smoother.
The vocabulary is adequate but somewhat repetitive and lacks variety. There are no spelling errors, and the phrasing is generally natural for a letter. However, more precise and varied vocabulary would enhance the letter's quality.
The letter demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures with minor errors. The sentences are generally accurate, but there are a few areas where more complex structures could be used to enhance clarity and sophistication.
Grammatical Errors
Error: "Iu2019m a person dedicated to doing a good job."
Explanation: Informal contraction 'Iu2019m' in a formal letter.
Correction: "I am a person dedicated to doing a good job."
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Task Achievement:
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Coherence & Cohesion:
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Lexical Resource:
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Grammatical Range:
Task Achievement
Addresses The Task Fully: 8
Clear Purpose & Tone: 7
Relevant Details: 7
Fits Appropriate Length: 8
Coherence & Cohesion
Logical Flow: 7
Clear Opening & Closing: 8
Linking Phrases: 6
Paragraph Variety: 6
Lexical Resource
Varied Vocabulary: 5
Accurate Spelling: 8
Appropriate Phrasing: 7
Grammatical Range
Complex Structures: 6
Accuracy: 8