Band 7 Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? Solved
User Stance
Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
Ever wonder how we stayed connected before social media took over? Nowadays, millions use it daily to chat with mates or catch up on news, and I reckon the benefits just about edge out the downsides. While it’s got its flaws, the way it brings people together and keeps us informed is hard to beat. Let’s dig into this.
First off, social media shrinks the world. You can message a friend across the globe in seconds or video-call family you haven’t seen in ages. In my country, I’ve kept in touch with an old schoolmate who moved to Canada without it, we’d have drifted apart. It’s instant, easy, and keeps relationships alive. That said, this links to a big plus: staying close despite distance.
On top of that, it’s a news goldmine. Events pop up on your feed faster than any paper could print think protests or storms. I remember scrolling Twitter during a local flood, getting updates quicker than the telly. Some might argue it spreads fake news too, which is fair, but you can usually spot the rubbish if you’re careful. Plus, it’s handy for finding out what’s on locally bit of a sidetrack, but true.
The catch? It can suck you in. Hours vanish scrolling, and that’s not healthy. Privacy’s another worry those dodgy ads seem to know too much. Still, I’d say these are manageable if you set limits.
In wrapping up, social media’s perks like connection and quick news outweigh its pitfalls, long as you use it sensibly. It’s a bit concerning how hooked we’ve got, though. Maybe the trick is enjoying it without letting it rule us?
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In-depth Feedback
The essay effectively addresses the question's focus on whether the advantages of social media outweigh its disadvantages. The writer presents a balanced view, discussing both the benefits (e.g., global connectivity, quick news updates) and drawbacks (e.g., time consumption, privacy concerns) of social media. The ideas are relevant and well-developed, with clear examples supporting the arguments. The essay meets the word count requirement and maintains a logical structure throughout. However, there is room for improvement in lexical resource and grammatical accuracy to elevate the overall quality.
Detailed Recommendations
The essay fully addresses the question by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of social media. The writer provides clear examples and maintains relevance throughout. However, some points could be more developed to strengthen the argument further.
The essay is well-organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The ideas flow logically, and linking words are used effectively. However, there is occasional repetition and some transitions could be smoother.
The vocabulary is adequate but somewhat repetitive. There are instances of colloquial language (e.g., 'mates,' 'telly') which may not be suitable for a formal essay. However, the writer uses some precise terms effectively (e.g., 'privacy concerns,' 'global connectivity').
The essay displays a good range of sentence structures, including complex sentences. There are minor grammatical errors, but they do not impede understanding. The accuracy is generally high, with only occasional slips.
Grammatical Errors
Error: "In my country, Iu2019ve kept in touch with an old schoolmate who moved to Canada without it, weu2019d have drifted apart."
Explanation: Run-on sentence; lacks proper punctuation.
Correction: "In my country, Iu2019ve kept in touch with an old schoolmate who moved to Canada. Without it, weu2019d have drifted apart."
Error: "Events pop up on your feed faster than any paper could print think protests or storms."
Explanation: Incomplete sentence; lacks clarity.
Correction: "Events pop up on your feed faster than any paper could print, such as protests or storms."
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Task Achievement:
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Coherence & Cohesion:
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Lexical Resource:
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Grammatical Range:
Task Achievement
Addresses The Task Fully: 8
Offers Clear, Developed Ideas: 8
Provides Relevant, Specific Support: 7
Fits Appropriate Length: 8
Coherence & Cohesion
Progresses Ideas Logically: 7
Clear Intro & Conclusion: 8
Uses Cohesive Devices Well: 7
Varies Cohesive Devices: 6
Lexical Resource
Varied Vocabulary: 6
Accurate Spelling & Formation: 8
Collocations: 6
Grammatical Range
Mixes Simple & Complex Forms: 7
Accurate Grammar: 7